How your mother relates to her body and food may have an impact on how you relate to your body and food.
From day one, we learn how to eat from our moms.
Quite literally, our first meal outside of the womb is from our mother’s body.
We associate our mother’s love and warmth with food, and when we are weaned from her body, she teaches us how to eat. Once we are old enough to feed ourselves, we can begin to mimic her eating behaviors, food choices, chewing pace, and even her feelings around food.
We can also absorb her feelings around her body.
If your mother struggled with food and her body—and now you’re struggling—you’re not alone.
Many of the women I work with today are the decedents of mothers or grandmothers who had tremendous pressure on them to be thin, pretty, and perfect. Recent past generations of women did not have as many opportunities to create their own income as we do. Quite often, beauty determined the likelihood of marriage, and therefore money and protection. In a way, being beautiful used to be necessary to survive.
We are lucky enough to live at a time where women do not need to marry in order to survive. In fact, I know many single women who are thriving on their own. Despite this societal progress, I’ve noticed some psychological residue from the past that has seeped its way into the minds and bodies of our current generation. Especially through the matriarchal line.
Our bodies are living extensions of our mother’s bodies, our mother’s mother’s bodies, and so on. They tell a story of our family history. The way we carry weight, the shape of our breasts, the size of our feet—these are all miraculous expressions of the lineage of woman to woman throughout time.
No wonder our relationship with our body is so connected to our mothers!
If your mother saw her body as something that was flawed and needed to be fixed, as a nuisance, as proof of her lack of worth, as anything other than a miracle—you have an opportunity to heal your matriarchal line.
You have the chance now to reclaim your body as beautiful, to prioritize eating nourishing food you love, to treat your body as the divine expression of life that it is. You have the chance to clear away the baggage from the past and pave the way for the next generation of women in your family, so that they may love their reflection in the mirror, eat with self-kindness according to their body’s supreme intelligence (not what a diet tells them to), and move with grace, ease, and energy through life without feeling a morsel of guilt or shame for taking up space.
Your relationship with food and your body is as deeply connected to your mother as it is to the next generation of women. Join your sisters and heal this lineage. Let’s forgive our mothers, show them compassion for what they’ve been through. And let’s be grateful for the amazing opportunity we have today—to thrive as independent, empowered women who can CHOOSE where we go from here.